My Adventures with God 51: Time to Act

51: Time to Act

Correction: my initial diagnosis that these folk held a false “Gospel of Self” may not be the complete story. I said earlier that once “the tumult and the shouting died” I had walked away from this time of great trial put it all behind me and left it there. And that it was quite painful having to re-read the documents I had kept stored away - which I had to do in order to check that I was re-telling the story accurately after all this time. I also said that during the events I am recounting, God was leading me a step at a time and I never really felt I got the whole picture. Which is a roundabout way of saying that I have now seen another factor which may explain the behaviour of the people who were opposing me.

No, I won't say what it is just yet. See if you can guess! Meanwhile I want to check it out further before I commit myself too much.

Back to the story!

I had been very careful not to take any hasty or precipitate action. But things were getting decidedly rotten in the state of Denmark, and unless I wanted to be like Hamlet, the time to act was approaching.

On the Nick side, I had tried to talk to him in vain. He then refused to take part in any service where I preached. He told me that: “You and what you preach are so evil that God has told me me not to be associated with a service where you preach”. Bear in mind my preaching was basically expounding the scripture readings set for the day, and if I laboured any theme at all it was “Christ crucified for our salvation” (For anyone interested there are some ordinary Sunday sermons I preached a year or so ago available in MP3 on this blog site – check for yourself if what I preach is “so evil”). Eventually he told me: “You must be removed from the ministry, even if it means destroying the parish.” Several times he challenged me to dismiss him, but I did not do so.

As my employed youth worker he got to attend meetings of the church council even though he was not a member of it. He was actively using this as a platform to say nasty things about me. “Hate speak” would be a fitting description.

I had also come to the conclusion that although he was very good at telling everyone how marvellous he was, he was not in fact a good youth worker. Partly it was the statistics. I found that other people had built up the youth groups to such a size that Nick was then hired to run them, replacing the people who had been running them. Under him they had over some years run down and one had failed completely the year before I arrived. Very early in my time I asked him to try to re-start the high school youth group. He just refused point blank.

Because it is also a clue to added diagnosis of the group I will put in here what he said one day about our respective roles (a hint for those trying to guess this diagnosis): Nick said: “You were only made the vicar of this parish by the human church, I was appointed its leader by God!”

My revised opinion of Nick's abilities was also partly due to things I heard as I did my pastoral visiting. I met families whose sons had been very active in St Luke's but were now active in other churches. In each case as they grew older Nick, like the alpha stag getting rid of the competition, had pushed them out of the church. People unkindly referred to the 20's and 30's youth Nick retained as “Nick's heifers”.

However Nick held considerable power. He was the focal point of a shadowy group known as “The Community” who were very very closely knit, and thought Nick was indeed the greatest!

Shirley was causing me concern on two fronts. Her adherents and Nick's held a majority on the church council. As well as turning every meeting into a hate session, they had petitioned the Bishop to appoint an investigator into their claims that I was a bad minister.

One of their delegates had come to see me and Sue. Their offer was simple: If I would admit I was wrong and reinstate Shirley to leading services, and administering the Communion Chalice and hand over planning of the worship services to her and from now on do exactly what Nick and Shirley told me to do, all these troubles would go away and I could have a happy ministry at St. Luke's. As with the previous offer (“If I just sacked Rodger from being a Church Warden”), I refused.

Their delegate then told me what they had in store for me: “We will make sure that you either leave this parish or have a nervous breakdown within six months!”

One tactic designed to bring on the threatened breakdown was to turn every church council meeting into an unending tirade of verbal abuse. One legal deposition made later said this: “I became vestry secretary in November 1992. … David's behaviour throughout the year was a fine Christian example to us all, particularly in humbleness … Only by God's grace and the indwelling the Holy Spirit could he have been able to withstand in the way he did the venomous verbal arrows directed at him at each meeting.”

The Shirley's other activity causing me concern was the music ministry. Shirley seemed to be the cause of strife there which was spilling over into the worship services.

Watching from the sidelines I could see that there were problems. One time I saw a music team member burst into tears just before a service after being spoken to harshly by the music leader and the way it was handled disturbed me. Another time in an evening service I was distressed to notice that the worship leader and the music leader were competing with one another for “control” of the worship time.

Division, dysfunction, and lack of a “servant” attitude were what I diagnosed in the music ministry at that time. Years later my observation was confirmed by depositions made by members of the music group from even before I came to the parish. For instance:

One said: “I have seen Shirley xxx just a few minutes before the commencement of the service, while the rest of us were at prayers with the leaders, come and change one or two of the planned pieces of music or songs for that service, that would throw us into confusion. The music ministry in those years of Rev'd Jack xxx was stressful and dominated by Shirley xxx.”

Another said: “From as early as 1989 [PS I arrived in 1990] there was disunity and evident lack of commitment among some members of the team. The leader and others of an 'inner group' were constantly critical of the 'performance' of those of us who were not part of their group.” … “Before music rehearsals a Bible study was held by one of the leaders. It was my experience that If I did not agree with the Bible teachings of the leaders, I was made to feel inferior and told that I was wrong.” …

“other members of the group said to me that they had the same perceptions. There was a 'gap' between those who were in the 'inner circle' and those of us who were outside that circle.-” … “During this time the atmosphere of rehearsals and performances in the services at St Luke's was one of great stress.”

My own observation was that Shirley, Jane and some others were far more interested in being up-front to do “their ministry” than in considering and serving the needs of the congregation. I did not know this at the time, but as a later deposition revealed, they had been warned prophetically about this and had ignored the warning. …

Later yet another member of the music team said:“During 1992 Jane xxx who was leading the group came to me twice in as many months and said words to the effect “Have you had a word from the Lord?” I had had a word from the Lord which referred me to certain passages in Isaiah and Jeremiah, namely those dealing with servant-hood. The first time Jane xxx asked me I was reluctant to say yes. The second time I said yes and Jane replied “Will you share it with the music group?” I agreed and did so at a meeting shortly after. There was no response from the members of the music group.

In February 1993 Jane xxx said to me: “You have something to share with the music group haven't you.” I said: “Yes.” Again the Lord had referred me to some biblical passages dealing with “The humble servant”. Jane arranged a meeting in March 1993 for me to tell the music group what I believed the Lord was saying to us. … When the meeting was being arranged I said to Jane: “Can I start at 8 o'clock and finish by 9.30, my son is going to --- and I need to collect him.” Jane agreed.

.When I arrived at the meeting prepared to speak at 8 o'clock I found that Shirley had prepared a worship segment … Shirley was still running it at 9.45 when my son arrived at the hall having got a lift there … The most disturbing thing about the worship segment was that the people were not reacting with praise and fervour. Shirley xxx soon started getting cross at that lack of enthusiasm, and she kept haranguing the group saying such things as “you're supposed to be praising the Lord” and 'You're supposed to be joyful I the Lord”.

About 10 o'clock I said to Jane xxx: “I'm tired – if you want me to speak to the group I will have to do it now.” Jane said: “I suppose you'd better share with us.” I read through the list of readings that dealt with the concept of servant hood that I had prepared. There was a silence at the end. After a while (a lady from Nick’s community) said “I don’t understand anything of this” and several people in the group said much the same. Shirley said nothing. There was no discussion. After a while Jane said “Thank you for that”. I went home.”

In May 1993 I did not know about this. But I had made my own observations. I came to two conclusions. First that Shirley had to be out of the music group. Second that the whole music group had to be 're-birthed' as one with a servant attitude. I wanted, even then, to spare Shirley the humiliation of being put out of the group, so I came up with a plan.

My plan was to disband the entire music group. Then to invite them to join a new group with a new “servant” manifesto. I would write privately to Shirley explaining why she was not to be part of this new music ministry.

I had also been considering what to do about Nick. Under the rules of the Church, he served at my pleasure, and I did not need to give any reason for dismissing him. None the less I asked the Bishop for advice in a letter. He never even replied. But he evidently gave the letter to the investigator he had appointed who simply said to me: “You're the Vicar. Its up to you.”

So by letter dated 2^nd June 1993 I dismissed Nick from ministry at St Luke's.

The same week I called a meeting of the music group. I hoped to explain my plan for a new beginning under a new “servant” manifesto, and that they would join in the new ministry.

Jane had other plans. I had told her what I intended, invited her to be the leader of the new group, and asked her to tell the music team what the meeting was about. He wouldn't and she hadn't respectively and she set about stirring the group into a frenzy, in part by reading my private letter to Shirley out to the group, accusing me of treating Shirley badly, and saying this was an attack on all of them. Most of them then refused to join the new group.

But God touched the hearts of some who came and formed the nucleus of the new ministry, with a new and very different attitude. It was small at first but it grew. In time it became vastly superior to the old one in every way. But that is a story for later.